The most important factor in a man’s attempt to be a good father is the support of his companion. Learn how you can help your partner be the best dad possible.
Nearly all mothers and wives have at one point in time felt frustrated with the father of their children. “I sometimes look at him bumbling along with the kids and want to throw my hands up in despair,” says Lee, a mother of two toddlers. “I get frustrated with his awkwardness in doing things that seem to come so naturally to me,” adds Lee. Many moms will argue that there are few dads who measure up to being a mom … but should they?
One of the advantages of being women is the ability to create support networks for ourselves. As women, we are eager to share our mothering experiences and concerns with each other, we support and encourage one another, and we draw from the vast experience of other mothers who are also willing to learn.
Be His Support Network
In the 21st Century, with the Internet at our fingertips and easy access to literature, there is certainly a lot of information readily available. But this just can’t replace the support and experience of friends and family. And since fathering is not a common topic in men’s social groups, the most valuable person to assist your partner in this regard is you—the mother of his child.
Research by the National Center for Fathering shows this to be true, and has proven that the most important factor in a man’s attempt to be a good father is his companion’s support. Yet as many mothers will agree, this is not as easy as it sounds.
“This has been a particularly difficult task for me, as my partner is not my daughter’s biological father,” says Justine, mother of two-year-old daughter, Meagan. “I try to teach him what I already know and guide him in the right direction without making him feel that he is not capable of handling Meg himself.”
Realistically though, taking the time and responsibility of helping your mate be a good father will prove less of a burden for you as a mother, and ultimately, will provide a better future for your children.
“I think that keeping the right perspective and respecting your partner as an individual, with his own way of doing things, helps a lot in allowing you to step back when he’s with the kids instead of jumping in and trying to offer a solution—your solution!” says Lee.